Message of love

For Ken's birthday this year I bought us his and hers jewelery - gold chains and crosses. The significance of this gift might not be readily apparent if you don't know us well.

First and foremost the jewelery is an outward representation of our unity: united in marriage and united in Christ. That one should be fairly obvious and it is the primary statement I wanted to make, but there are other reasons I bought the jewelery.

Have you ever heard of that "love language" thing? Supposedly each of us has a method, a "language" if you will of how we view expressions of love, both given and received. Ken's love language is giving and receiving gifts. When someone gives him a gift he views it as an expression of love towards him. It is also his primary way of demonstrating his love towards others. And the bigger the gift, the greater the love.

I, however, have a different love language. My language is to do things for others. That's how I demonstrate my love for others - I do things for them. And for me, the more "menial" the job, the greater the love I am demonstrating. Conversely, I view acts of kindness done for me as proof of devotion.

As far as love languages go, we are pretty much at opposite ends of the spectrum. We're aware of each others languages and we do try to give and receive love with that understanding but...well, let's just say that it doesn't come naturally for either of us.

Ken is also a big fan of the bling. He likes big rings and wears multiple bracelets and necklaces. We have a little saying: Ken likes the shiny and impractical. *smile* But me? Not so much. I prefer the understated. I wear very little jewelery and the thought of spending a lot of money on jewelery makes me shudder.

So you can see then, why this birthday gift has special significance. With it I tried to speak in the love language that he understands and in a way that would be unmistakeable to him. I think he gets it because he hasn't taken off the necklace since I gave it to him.