I'm Not Your Typical Lutheran

In some ways I am the quintessential Lutheran. I embrace our traditions in a big way, always looking for the meaning behind them that give them relevance. I am on board with Lutheran theology, as outlined in The Lutheran Confessions. I'm what they call "quia". I love the beauty and biblical basis for the liturgy and I find the predictable rhythm of the "church year" comforting. I love a good Law/Gospel sermon (shows our sins; shows our Saviour, remember?). In many ways, I'm as Lutheran as they come. *smile* But there's one way that I am VERY atypical for a Lutheran.

Lutherans are known for being reserved and ordered in worship. Maybe it is borne out of our German origins and the German desire for order, I don't know. It is at least partly due to Paul's admonition that worship "should be done in a fitting and orderly way". Some people find us "cold". (Now, I would argue strenuously that "ordered" does not equal "joyless", but that is how some perceive it.)

In this way I am different from the typical Lutheran worshipper. I am a little more...dramatic. *wink* I wear my heart on my sleeve and I cry pretty near every Sunday. Sometimes it's a beautiful hymn that brings me to tears. Sometimes it's something the pastor says in the sermon that makes me weep. I bawl like a baby - with joy! - at every baptism. (Yes, EVERY baptism. Come on, seeing a brand new creation in Christ? Never gets old.) I nod my head and murmur "yes, Jesus" in corporate prayer, but I do it quietly so as not to disturb the worship of others. It just comes out of me sometimes, you know? Sometimes I can't help it and laugh - heartily - out loud.

My reserved and ordered brethren accept my "dramatics" with good humour. Nobody admonishes me for it. I think they understand that is it just another way that I am "unashamed" - they are too, they are just better at keeping their emotions in check than I am. Plus, I see them demonstrate their emotions in different ways. For example, on their way to receive communion, some pause and rest their hand for a moment on the baptismal font, no doubt recalling their own baptism. After the service, people excitedly discuss the sermon and how it spoke to them. Outside of the Divine Service, people speak with emotion about their love for Jesus and longing to live according to His precepts. And sometimes I see that I am not the only one surreptitiously wiping away a few tears.

Ironically, it was the very order of the worship that first attracted my husband to the Lutheran church. He grew up in a tradition where emotionalism was seen (he felt) as "proof" of one's love of God. He always felt that there was something the matter with him because he couldn't cry in worship. He feels much more at home in a reserved and respectful style of worship. And then he ends up marrying one of the few Lutheran "cryers". *smile* I sometimes wonder what God was/is trying to teach him by that. If I had to guess, it would be that our outward emotions in worship are not a true indication of what is in our hearts. Whether our worship style is "swinging from the chandeliers" (as Beth says) or stoic like my husband, God knows what's really in our hearts.